Honorable or Dishonorable

Mulla Nasrudin had been calling on his girlfriend for over a year.

One evening the girl's father stopped him as he was leaving and asked, "Look here, young man, you have been seeing my daughter for a year now, and I would like to know whether your intentions are honorable or dishonorable?"

Nasrudin's face lit up. "Do you mean to say, Sir," he said, "That I have a choice?"

Never Ask Why

"You don't love me any more," said Mulla Nasrudin's wife through her tears. "When you see me crying, you never ask why."

"I am sorry, Darling," said Nasrudin, "But that sort of question has already cost me an awful lot of money.”

Happiest Days

Mulla Nasrudin came up and shook hands with the future bridegroom. "Congratulations, friend," he said, "on this, one of the happiest days of your life."

"But I am not getting married until tomorrow," said the future bridegroom. "I Know," said the Mulla. "That’s what makes this one of the happiest days."

More Sense Asleep

The young lady's hopes had been high for two years while Mulla Nasrudin remained silent on the question of marriage.

Then one evening he said to her, "I had a most unusual dream last night. I dreamed that I asked to marry you. I wonder what that means."

"That means," said his girlfriend, "That you have more sense asleep than you are awake."

Promises, Promises

"Darling," said the young woman,"I could die for your sake."

"You are always promising that,” said Mulla Nasrudin, "But you never do it."

Drunk Husband

Mulla Nasrudin's young wife, recently returned from her honeymoon, was complaining to her friend about her husband's drinking habits.

"If you knew he drank, why did you marry him?" her friend asked. "I did not know he drank," said Nasrudin's wife, "Until one night he came home sober."

Public Speaking

Mulla Nasrudin, who was really unaccustomed to public speaking, arose in confusion after dinner and muttered hesitatingly: "M-m-my f-f-friends, when I came here tonight only God and me knew what I was about to say to you, and now only God knows!"

Growing Old

Mulla Nasrudin, celebrating his 95th birthday was asked by a friend: "Don't you hate growing old, Mulla?"

"Heck, no,"said Nasrudin.

"If I wasn’t growing old, I'd be dead."

Break The Habit

A school teacher wrote a note home to Abdul's mother: "Dear Mrs. Nasrudin, your son, Abdul, is a smart boy, but he spends all of his time with the girls. I am trying to break him of this habit."

The teacher received this reply: "I wish you success. Please let me know how you do it. I have been trying for years to break his father of the same habit."

What Is Wrong With Me?

"Doctor," a woman said as she rushed into Mulla Nasrudin's house, "I want you to tell me frankly, exactly what is wrong with me." Nasrudin looked her over from head to foot, then said, "Madam, I have three things to tell you.

First, you are about fifty pounds overweight, Second, your looks would be improved if you took off several layers of rouge and lipstick. And third, i am not the doctor. the doctor's office is across the street."

Painting Wonder

Mulla Nasrudin was chatting with his master who had taken up art.

"When I look at one of your paintings, Sir," he said, "all I can do is stand and wonder."

"Wonder how I do it?" asked the master.

"No," said Nasrudin. "Why you do it."

Law Of Compensation

Mulla Nasrudin's son, home from college, was talking to his father about the "Law of Compensation," which he had studied.

"If a person loses one eye," he explained, "the sight in the other becomes stronger. If he loses the hearing in one ear, the hearing in the other becomes more acute. If he loses one hand, he becomes more agile with the other."

"I guess that's right," said Nasrudin. "I have always noticed that when a man has one short leg the other is longer."

Borrow From Me

A well-known dead-beat caught Mulla Nasrudin on the street one day before the Mulla could duck.

"I am really in a jam and need money," he said to the Mulla," and I have not any idea where I am going to get some." "I am sure glad to hear that," said Nasrudin.

"I was afraid you might have the mistaken idea you could borrow some from me."

Unmarried Forever

A young lady went to old Mulla Nasrudin for advice.

She said to the Mulla: "Should I marry a fellow who lies to me?"

"Yes, unless you want to remain unmarried forever," said Nasrudin.

Who's The Boss?

"You ought to stand on your two feet and show your wife who is running things at your house," a big, bossy fellow said to his friend, Mulla Nasrudin.

"There is no need to," said Nasrudin, "She already knows."

Inventor On The Wall

Mulla Nasrudin, the landlord of a rather rundown rooming house, had led a prospective tenant to a third-floor room with badly spotted wall paper.

Nasrudin: "The last man who lived in this room was an inventor he invented some sort of explosive." Prospect: "Oh, these spots on the walls are chemicals?"

Nasrudin: "No, the inventor."

Play Anything You Like

Mulla Nasrudin kept begging the noted pianist to play. "Well, all right, since you insist," he said.

"What shall I play?" "Anything you like," said Nasrudin.

"It's only to annoy the neighbours."

Telling Not Asking

It seemed that every time Mulla Nasrudin met his lawyer, he had some added legal fees. It worried the Mulla to the point of ulcers.

Then one day, he met his lawyer in the post office and said, "Nice day, isn't it? And remember, I am telling you, not asking you."

Getting Used To It

Mulla Nasrudin was telling a friend his future through palmistry. He said, "You will be poor and unhappy and miserable until you are sixty."

"Then what?" asked the man hopefully. "By that time," said Nasrudin, "You will be used to it."

Which Girl Should I Marry

A college freshman was talking about girls with Mulla Nasrudin. "Which would you advise me to do? Marry a sensible girl or a beautiful girl, Mulla?" he asked.

"I don't think you will be able to marry either," said the Mulla. "Why not?" asked the freshman.

"It's logical," said Nasrudin. "A beautiful girl could do better and a sensible girl would know better."

No Whipping

"Why are you so down in the mouth, Mulla?" asked someone in the tavern. "Aw," said Mulla Nasrudin, "I just heard a guy call another fellow a liar.

And that fellow said that if he didn't apologize, he would whip him." "Well, why should that make you so sad?" asked the first.

"Because," said Nasrudin, "The guy apologized."

Video On Mulla Nasrudin Story

Loreleila reads from 'The Exploits of the Incomparable Mullah Nasrudin' by Idries Shah.

Two Questions

Mulla Nasrudin opened a booth with a sign above it: Two Questions On Any Subject Answered For Only 100 Silver Coins.

A man who had two very urgent questions handed over his money, saying: A hundred silver coins is rather expensive for two questions, isn't it?

Yes, said Nasruddin, and the next question, please?

Not Everybody Can Be That Lucky

"Everybody has something to be thankful for," the minister said to Mulla Nasrudin, who was sitting in his office telling a tale of woe.

"Look at the man across the street from you who just lost his wife in an automobile accident."

"Yes," said Nasrudin, "but everybody can't be that lucky, sir."